thoughts | thirty-somethings

height requirements

by vivaciousdeb

So, I know height is an issue for many women. Because I have too much time on my hands and I really enjoyed making a graph, I decided to track the height of 100 men. All completely random. There was no rhyme or reason to my clicking. Yes, I know. I need a life.

I always wanted somebody that was OVER 6’0″ and by looking at my chart…that narrows it down to 20 men! That’s crazy. I then changed standard to 5’9.” Thats a major change. I’m proud of myself. That brought up the number to 72. That’s pretty good.

Anyways, here’s my chart.

I’m hoping this will help women put the height requirements into perspective.

life in all its glory OkCupid single life

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the results are in!

by vivaciousdeb

Remember I said I was going to keep track of the profiles I came across to figure out whether or not I was too picky? Well, I kept track of 100 profiles. It’s a mixture of men that contacted me and profiles I clicked on.

I guess if you look at the numbers, it may seem as though I am picky. But you know what? I don’t care anymore. I am AWESOME and I deserve to be with somebody that’s just as awesome as I am. There are many things that are important to me and I will not lower my standards for the sake of not being single.

Out of the 100 profiles I came across, I was interested in 27. I thought I’d make this legit and make some graphs.

I tried to keep track of the reasons as to why I was uninterested.

I don’t understand why some people just don’t put effort into their profiles. Simply saying “if you have any questions, just ask!” Ugh, so annoying. Another top reason is what I classified as “meh.” I know it doesn’t explain much but it means that there was nothing that stuck out to me and I was uninterested in them. Politically, I’m super liberal so being with somebody that’s conservative will not work for me. I’m deathly allergic to cats so being with somebody that has them is out of the question.

I’m not going to bore all of you and explain all of the reasons why I wasn’t interested in the men.

Does this mean I’m too picky? Maybe. Should I feel bad for it? Hell no.

life in all its glory

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i just want to feel wanted

by vivaciousdeb

I’ve been in a little bit of a funk lately. I think it’s about time I try and sort through these thoughts of mine.

Wanting to feel wanted applies to many aspects of my life. Not just dating; although, the point of my post is about the dating aspect, I think.

I’m not a fan of my job; actually…I kind of hate it. But, it is what it is. I’m (hopefully) going to start grad school in the fall, so things will change soon! I don’t feel like I’m needed/wanted there. I don’t feel challenged. I feel that everything would be just fine if I wasn’t there.

With my friends, I just want to feel that they think about me when they hang out and want me to join them so they call me and invite me. Even if it is last minute. I just want to know that I crossed somebody’s mind.

Even in my dating life…I want to feel wanted. I was recently at one of my friends house and her boyfriend was there. Throughout the night, he referred to her as beautiful, pretty, sexy, and maybe a couple other words describing how good looking she is. I love that she’s with somebody like that. She deserves it. I’ve never had that though. I’ve never had a man I’m seeing say that to me. Is that weird? I think it is. It’s no wonder why I don’t ever feel sexy, nobody has ever made me feel attractive. I know I’m not super mega attractive but I know I’m not ugly.

Every now and again, I’ll get an occasional “you have such a gorgeous smile!” Yeah, I know. Thanks.

I want a guy to look at me and for me to feel he wants to rip off my clothes. Obviously not all of the time, but every now and again…at least. Is that for real? Or is that something that’s just in books I read or movies I watch?

Maybe I need to learn how to feel sexy before I expect somebody else to find me sexy. I don’t know how exactly I can do that. I’ll do some research.

dating Real Life single life

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eager beaver

by vivaciousdeb

I’ve been exchanging messages with this young fellow I’ve nicknamed eager beaver since December 23rd. We’ve been texting for about 4-5 days now. He’s very attentive, he compliments me (which unfortunately doesn’t happen very often in general…so it’s really nice!), he has a good job, lives with roommates, all in all…he’s a pretty cool guy. We were supposed to go out on Sunday but I wasn’t feel well.

We decided we were going to go out today but now he isn’t feeling well. I don’t really know what’s going to happen.

I’m afraid the physical attraction just isn’t going to be there so I really want to meet him already and get it over with. I’m afraid he likes me a lot more than I like him. He’s constantly telling me how excited he is to meet me and how awesome I am. Don’t get me wrong, I like hearing these things…but geez! He needs to calm down.

I’m nervous about meeting him. It needs to happen ASAP.

dating life in all its glory OkCupid single life

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and the award goes to…..

by vivaciousdeb

When I first started this blog, I was a little worried that I wouldn’t have enough to write about. But awesome things keep happening!

I’ve decided I’m going to give “awards” to guys I come across. I don’t know what all of the awards are going to be, but my first one will be LIAR OF THE WEEK!

Now, I know body description is a hard one to answer. I have a hard time answer that because I don’t even know what my body is considered. Yeah, I’m overweight but I’m not obese. I’m listed as curvy but I constantly doubt myself and feel I should maybe put full figured just so guys don’t think I’m misrepresenting myself.

I’ve mentioned before I’m on a weight loss journey so on my profile I state that I’d like to find somebody that’ll be there next to me, while we support each other.

Anyways, this guy messages me and within that message he says “…playing softball which I do pretty regularly to socialize and get some exercise in.” Mind you, his profile says his body type is a little extra. This dude has a ginormous belly. I’m pretty sure my arms wouldn’t be able to wrap around it. I’m not judging, I’m a big girl. It’s not easy losing weight, but don’t lie about it.

SO…without further ado, I’d like to present this weeks “liar of the week” award to:

Trying to be careful with how much I show. But do you all see what I’m talking about?

Dude, you aren’t fooling anybody. That is NOT “a little extra.”

Awards life in all its glory OkCupid

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lowering my standards?

by vivaciousdeb

So, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about whether or not I’m too picky. The days where my confidence is booming, I feel I’m not being picky because I deserve to be somebody that’s up to my standards. The days where I’m feeling a little bummed, I think maybe I should lower my standards because clearly something is going wrong if I’m 27 and very much single.

I’ve already lowered some of my standards but how low am I going to have to go? Before, I only wanted to date guys who were never married and didn’t have kids. HOWEVER, the older I get…the more I see how hard it is to find that, it’s nearly impossible. So, I had no choice but to change that. Now, I simply prefer they don’t have kids.

Also, I used to have a height requirement. Yeah, that’s ridiculous of me, I know. Get over it. My height requirement used to be 6’0″ but it’s been lowered to 5’10.” Certain days even about 5’9.” Even then…I feel that it’s getting lower and lower. I guess I should just want somebody the same height as me.

Anyways, I got an idea from another blog: http://talesofatvaholic.com/2012/12/16/am-i-too-picky/ . I am going to start tracking people I look at, contact, respond to, etc. THEN I’m going to calculate my level of pickiness.

I have some time off until school starts, so this should keep my busy! This is going to be legit, spreadsheet and all.

I’m looking forward to seeing my results, I hope you all are too!

life in all its glory Real Life single life

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