thirty-somethings

life in all its glory

I just want to be hit on…..

is that too much to ask for??

Like, in person. I want a guy to approach me and hit on me! I want a guy to ask me out on a date. Ask for my number. I mean…something! I honestly can’t remember the last time that happened. It’s been years. Is being hit on still a thing? I have other friends that are approached by men when we’re out. So it’s gotta be a thing. Maybe it’s not a thing for me.

I was hoping that with my weight loss maybe I’d get a little attention. No, I didn’t lose weight to get the attention and I didn’t do it for somebody else. I was just hoping that it would be a positive thing that would come from being skinnier.

But it hasn’t. It’s disheartening. Disappointing. And such a lonely feeling.

 

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Pet names

What is it with guys that use pet names right off the bat? Sweetie, babe, hun, love, baby etc. Mr. Jokester was like that. Also, another guy on OkCupid was like that too. I mean, literally every sentence he was saying something. Is that weird? Or am I weird for being annoyed?? We haven’t even met!!

That guy (let’s call him Mr. Insults). We had only exchanged a few messages and he kept pushing us meeting. Wanted to go to the movies (which let’s talk about the fact that going to the movies on the first time meeting, is already kinda weird) or then wanted to get coffee. Just made me feel uncomfortable why he kept pushing it. Mind you, he had complimented me a few times throughout the messages. But I just didn’t feel good about it. I told him “I don’t like this pressure to meet up. Sorry, I’m not interested.”

His response? : “You have a wig”

UH. WHAT? hahahaha….is that code for something? am I supposed to be offended?

What an interesting character. Wonders of online dating, y’all!

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Milestones (part two)

It’s been a while since I’ve posted an update on my post-bariatric surgery life. It has been quite a journey for me. A wonderfully positive journey for me! I had my six month post-op appointment this past week. My doctor said I’m doing really well! My labs all came out good! Except for one, that we’ll be monitoring. But for the most part, everything is great!! Having this surgery is the best decision I’ve ever made.

My doctor said that people who have this surgery typically lose a total 50%-70% of their excess weight. I’m already at 64% at the six-month mark. Per my doc, that’s a great sign. I’ve lost a total of 65 lbs.

About a month or so ago, I went shopping for the first time. It was quite an experience. Started out terribly but ended wonderfully! At that point I had lost around 60ish lbs. Mind you, I had only really shopped in one store – Torrid (plus size).  I was not sure what size I was – I knew I likely was not plus size anymore. I just didn’t know where to start. I decided I would go to Forever 21. Terrible idea. Bright lights, huge store, loud music – I had no idea where to start. I was so overwhelmed. I almost had a panic attack. I lasted maybe five minutes and had to leave. Walked into H&M right next door. Another terrible idea. It was another reoccurrence of forever 21.

I talked to a couple of my girlfriends because I legit had no idea where to start. Through conversation, I decided I was going to go to express. A few days later, I go. I was greeted by a wonderful employee, asking if I needed help. I explained to her that I had recently lost a lot of weight and had no idea where to start but I desperately needed some new clothes. SHE WAS SO KIND! Not only did she walk throughout the store with me, picking outfits, but she also helped me figure out that I still picture myself as much larger than I really am. I needed a reality check.

It’s a funny story, she asked me what size I was maybe thinking I was. I said 12 – assuming I was the largest of the “regular sizes.” She looked at me, said I looked like a 10. I jokingly told her she’s crazy. She convinced me. Same thing with the shirts. I told her I thought I was a large, she told me, I’m a medium. Again I told her she’s crazy. But at the end, she convinced me. I tried them on…and THEY FIT. I quietly cried in the fitting room when everything fit. I’ve gone down about four sizes. Before the surgery, I was a 2XL (honestly, borderline 3XL). I mean, holy shit! That’s a whole lot of sizes.

I’m trying to get used to this new body I’m in. I feel so much more comfortable in my skin. My health has improved exponentially. I sleep better, I’m no longer in danger of becoming diabetic. I’m getting closer to getting off my blood pressure medicine. My weight loss has slowed down but that’s normal at this point in my recovery. All in all, everything is moving along swimmingly.

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Mr. Jokester

So, Mr. Jokester didn’t work out. I mean, can I catch a break? We didn’t even meet in person!!! He was a weirdo. Seemed like he has some emotional stuff to work through. Kept telling me that “all women are pyscho.” Talked about how he’s always be lied to, cheated on or taken advantage of. Seemed really insecure and gave conflicting messages. One second he’s saying he wishes people would make plans but then the other second he’s saying doesn’t like to make plans – a “go with the flow” kind of person.

What ever happened to courting? Why can’t I just get a guy to ask me out on a date?? like, a REAL DATE! Am I being too old fashioned??? Am I asking for too much?

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