didn’t get a chance to read part one? Click here.
Mr. Linguist and I were supposed to go out yesterday but that didn’t happen. When we planned it happened sorta like this: “Hey, let’s meet up next monday” “yeah, that’ll be wonderful!” That was it. Nothing else was decided. All of last week (until Friday) we were talking every day, throughout the day. Then come Friday morning, I stop hearing from him. We had only been emailing up until then, no phone numbers were exchanged. When Monday rolls around and I hadn’t heard from him practically all day…I kinda assume we’re not meeting up anymore. Right around 4pm he emails me saying “did you ever give me your phone number?” uhhh…no, no i didn’t. You never asked me for it. I gave it to him and he texts me like 10 minutes later and asks if I was ready for tonight. WAIT, WHAT?!
Was it wrong of me to assume we were no longer going out?? I told him since I hadn’t heard from him, I thought we weren’t going out and I had made plans. I lied, I totally didn’t. I mean, we were talking EVERY DAY….and I don’t hear from him from Friday morning all the way until Monday evening. Anyways, he said he understood but that he still wanted to see me. He handled it well. We’re meeting up tomorrow night instead.
Mr. Lazy Ass: as expected….that didn’t go anywhere. He said we should talk on the phone later on that night. I didn’t call so obviously it didn’t happen. Haven’t heard from him since.
Mr. Sexual: Oh Mr. Sexual, I kinda want to dedicate a whole post to him….but I’ll just get it all out there now. I broke it off it him. He was actually kinda nice to talk to but he’s just so oblivious to how to talk to women (at least that’s my theory, I could be totally wrong). Turns out, his last relationship ended in 2007. Yes, 6 years ago. Some people have stated that if it’s been too long since his last relationship…it’s a red flag. I don’t know if I agree with that…but it is what it is. Also, it’s been a year since he’s had sex. Our conversation went like this last night:
Him: is that where you’re going? Brazilian BBQ? (I told him I was going out to dinner)
Me: Oh no. those places are expensive!
Him: Oh hahaha. Ok I’ll remember not to take a date there.
Me: wow lol
Him: lol. what? too soon? (p.s. I don’t know what he was referring to here. I don’t know what too soon lol)
Me: No comment.
Him: lol. ok. yeah, I’m thrifty. [Pause] Besides why would I go all out on a woman I just met?
Me: so how long do you keep that sort of mentality? Is 3 dates considered somebody you just met? 5 dates? At what point do you splurge on your date?
Him: Depends on how she’s treating me. But I would say 5 to 7 dates and we better have an amazing night of sex.
Yes. Let that sink in. He said: we BETTER have an amazing night of sex. So he feels entitled to sex when he just so happens to splurge on his girl. Also, I’d like to just add a comment that I’m not a gold digger, I don’t choose guys based on their profession. I mean, remember the guy from speed dating? He was a doctor and I didn’t want to pursue anything with him. Anyways, I needed to get to the bottom of this conversation lol. Let me continue:
Me: So what are some places you’d take your date on those first 5 dates?
Him: Jeez, idk. probably a bar or coffee shop on the first. a nice but inexpensive restaurant on the second, shoot pool on the third, museum or wine tasting fourth. but there’s some room for deviation, I’m sure. [long pause] why does it matter anyway where i take a woman or how much i spend on her? Is she going out with me for me or for what she can get outta me? Or is where I take her or the amount I spend on her somehow an entitlement to her love and body?
Me: Whoa. There’s no need to get defensive. I was just curious to know where you’d take somebody on dates
Him: I’m not defensive. I’ve just always wondered. Women get so worked up about where a guy takes them on a date.
Me: I can’t explain why women do what they do. I can only explain why I do what I do.
Him: Dam, I was hping you’d give me some insight.
Me: You seem to think you have it all figured out. Since you think women get all worked up over dates.
Him: well, I just observe general trends based on my experience. I think If i really understood women, I wouldn’t be so sexually frustrated.
And there you have it. He thinks if he understood women he wouldn’t be so sexually frustrated and he would be getting some ass. Yes, that may be true but DAMN! Why is he so focused on sex?!? I mean, I know this is a huge thing for men….but keep it to yourself!! A woman you can potentially see yourself dating should not know this information.
So yeah, I broke things off with him. He’s way too concerned about having sex. Also, he said the only thing he missed about relationships is “sex and the occasional night out.” We then got into a conversation about the good qualities of a relationship and turns out all of his relationships have been all sorts of fucked up. His fault? I don’t know. But something is definitely off with this dude.
thirty-somethings 
kind of liked him, you know, cause he has been all clear with you about “it”… but… he sounds a little not ok of his sexual life… in portuguese, we say… “mal resolvido”… he doesn´t let it go the way it is, natural! … So, agree with you, this guy is not, the GUY!
Strangely, I agree with you! I think it was kinda good that he was upfront about sex. Far better than trying to deceive, at any rate.
Oh I totallyyyy agree with the both of you! It wasn’t the fact that he wanted sex that turned me off…it’s that he was SO creepy about it! He was just so weird. I got a really weird vibe from him.
Oh wow oh wow oh wow! lol…The last guy sounds like a total scumbag. I am also leery of men that have been single that long. 7 yrs without a relationship?? That’s a big Red Flag for me. Also, poor dude sounds like he’s wound tighter than a coil. hahaa…Good job steering clear of him.
I mean, I try not to think about the whole last relationship thing as a red flag but I think in this case it was TOTALLY a red flag.
I think once he has sex, he’ll feel better LOL. It’s just not happenin with me 🙂